8 Halloween Costumes You Should Not Let Any of Your Friends Wear

Friends don't let friends go as the BP oil spill for Halloween.

1. Grass Second Skin Zentai Suit, $29.99
Kristin: Why would a sentient grass person need a fanny pack? Is it going to Disneyland?
Chrissy: If he's carrying weed in that tiny pouch, he's definitely the world's worst drug dealer.

2. Way High Patrol Man, $29.99
Chrissy: The only thing more offensive than this costume for men are those fake Oakleys.
Kristin: Yeah, the most annoying part about this halloween costumes for men is that there was definitely a way to execute this general concept without being racist. JUST HAVE HIM COVERED IN POT LEAVES. But this thing is just the phrase "Well, actually…" in costume form.

3. Skeleboner, $18.22
Kristin: IT'S THE GHOST OF MY TWITTER MENTIONS.
Chrissy: I love this costume because it screams "I FAILED BIOLOGY" all the way across a crowded party room.

4. Bad Planning, $29.99
Kristin: … is this actually a BP oil spill costume?
Chrissy: The only "bad planning" here is the existence of this god awful costume.

5. Convicted Cutie Womens Halloween Costume, $36.95
Kristin: Very good for when you forget where the boobs are.
Chrissy: Glad to see the ol' 55378008 calculator trick successfully made it past elementary school into full adulthood.

6. Inflatable Doll Men's Costume, $23.99
Kristin: So this should help you answer the question of whether or not you'd ever fuck one of the Mario Brothers.
Chrissy: A blow up doll without genitalia is a just a shitty mannequin.

7. Capitol Hill, $61.95
Kristin: How do you have a Hillary Clinton pantsuit costume WITH NO PANTS?
Chrissy: *GASP* Hillary would never be seen in public without highlights.

8. Lady Luck, $42.47
Kristin: "I'm going as that feeling you get when you find $5 in an old purse!"
Chrissy: *won $4 in Las Vegas once*